


Bite in the Ass.

by findtherightwords



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Little bit of Fluff, Little bit of angst, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Oneshot that became a two shot and developed into a three chapter work, Oneshot that may become a two shot, Oops, Peter is a Good Guy, Regulus is basically a fifth Marauder, Unrequited crush (possibly), Writer is also mildly sleep deprieved, Writer is dyslexic, and an ambiguous ending, but still defends Slytherin, he's also a Gryffindor, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-04
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:14:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22559239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/findtherightwords/pseuds/findtherightwords
Summary: During winter vacation, the Marauders and Regulus find themselves gathered together in the Potter mansion and decide to entertain themselves with Truth or Dare. Sirius is smarter than he looks, and gives a dare to his brothers that makes one of them realise something they hadn't even figured out yet.
Relationships: Peter Pettigrew/Emma Vanity (referenced), Regulus Black/James Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 7
Kudos: 204





	1. A game

**Author's Note:**

> This is lowkey a guilty pleasure ship of mine when AU storylines are involved. This is loosely based off an AU story I'm in the process of writing (James and Regulus just aren't a real thing in it.) Since it's not actually addressed in this story, Sirius moved in with James a lot earlier in this timeline. I hope I made the rest of the AU clear enough.

Christmas antics. They’ve happened every year, and would probably continue to for as long they were alive. The five of them could be married with children, and the antics would shift to include those who came into their lives. Regulus supposed he couldn’t make complaints, he was just as much to blame as the others.

The boys had taken over a sitting room that was barely used anyway, unless the Potters had guests. They did, technically; Remus and Peter were there. They didn’t need that excuse to get the room to themselves, Euphemia and Fleamont usually let them do as they pleased, as long as they weren’t causing trouble… or at least, not trouble they needed to concern themselves with. Regulus imagined the two adults felt more comfortable with them being alone, since both he and Remus were there. They tried to reign in James and Sirius, keep them from acting on their stupidest ideas, keep them behaved enough that they wouldn’t need the company of Mr and Mrs Potter. Their tactics were different, Remus explaining why something was a bad idea, while Regulus himself pointed out the consequences. A reminder that if they pushed their luck, they’d end up with chaperones was usually enough to calm the worst of the James and Sirius storm. 

The five were fully aware of how to entertain themselves for hours, and with no homework to distract them, they were in the full swing of being reckless and lazy teenagers. 

“Now that I’ve beat everyone here at Exploding Snap, what shall we move onto next?” James asked, looking more pleased with himself than he already did on a day-to-day basis. 

Sirius groaned, resting his head on Remus’ shoulder, who simply patted his head. “Reg, you were supposed to win for us. You’re a Seeker, you’re supposed to have quick reflexes,” he complained, full of dramatics. 

Regulus shrugged, not particularly apologetic, even if he was frustrated that he’d lost. “I got closer than the rest of you. It was an even match, he just got the upper hand.” If it wasn’t for the concern of singing their hair from their faces and heads, he may have demanded the best of three. James was already pushing his luck, risking his wild hair, with how many games he played.

The man in question grinned wider, and threw an arm around his shoulder. “It’s because you love me. You were distracted, and I got the upper hand.” At least he didn’t accuse him of throwing the game. “It’s okay. I don’t blame you, Reg.”

He simply rolled his eyes at James’ insanity and ego, but nevertheless leaned into him. “Are we going to decide our next activity, or are we just gonna sit here and discuss Exploding Snap and how bad the rest of you are at it?”

“W– what’s a matter, don’t w-anna discuss your lo-love lif-e?” Peter stuttered out, attempting to tease the two cuddled on the couch, but his anxiety got the better of him. 

Regulus didn’t have time to answer before James jumped in, hyper as ever. “We just don’t wanna make you feel left out, Wormy. Pads and Moony are a breath away from snogging their faces off, and Reg and I are obviously the perfect couple. We just wanna make sure to include you,” he winked at the blond, who was bright red.

He glanced at Sirius and Remus the same time Remus rolled his eyes. “We have some tact, thank you. We save our snogging for when we’re alone.” It would have been better not to egg James on, and usually Remus knew that, but sometimes he slipped and still replied against his better judgement. Sirius, however, was not bothered by the accusation.

As expected, it only made it worse. “Private, eh? Then how do you explain you two sucking each other’s faces off in the hallways at school, too impatient to find a broom closet… or in the common rooms, rather than our dorm?”

“Please don’t encourage them doing it in the dorm. I’ve already walked in on it a number of times, and it makes me regret talking Davey into switching dorms with me every time,” Regulus cut in. It had been a miracle they’d been allowed, and it really didn’t take Davey much convincing. The kid had already lived with the Marauders for over a year, so when he brought up the idea of switching dorms with him after winter of his first year, it only became a matter of convincing McGonagall. Even at thirteen, Sirius was charismatic, able to point out the difficult situation Regulus was put in, being all but disowned as well, playing to her sympathies. Shortly after, he and Davey switched dorms. 

Sirius was the one to defuse it all, for a change. “What’s say we play a different game?” he asked, turning his eyes to Wormtail. “What’s that one you told us about, Pete? That your muggle cousin introduced you to?”

Peter first seemed surprised by being addressed, then had to pause to think. “Uh.. Tr-truth or dare, I think.”

“That’s the one. How about we make it a bit more interesting? If you’re given a question you don’t want to answer, you can take a shot or a dare. Same if there’s a dare you don’t want to do, except you obviously take a truth.” Sirius was always the type for making things bigger, and more dramatic. Especially if there was alcohol involved.

Remus eyed his boyfriend. “You really think it’s good to be drinking here?”

“We drink in the dorms, and we’re always fine. Besides, we don’t  _ have _ to drink,” Sirius pointed out. It was only meant to be an incentive to do whatever was asked of them.

Since Regulus didn’t interject, Remus let it go. He still didn’t approve, but he figured it wasn’t worth trying to talk them out of it. “Want to start then, since it’s your idea?” Regulus asked, glancing at his brother. 

Shifting his head from Remus’ shoulder, he sat up proudly. “Happily. Wormtail, truth or dare?”

The squeak that came out of his lips was so realistic, it was almost a surprise to see him still sitting there as a human boy. “Why me first?” he protested. None of them offered up an answer, so he chewed on his lip and thought. “Uh– truth, I guess.”

“Did you really kiss Emma Vanity last year, after the Quidditch match between Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw?” he asked, his position relaxing once again, which meant he was back to being tangled with the werewolf next to him.

Peter was such a bright red that he would have matched his Gryffindor robes, if he was wearing them. “I– it– she–.. I didn't initiate it, but it did happen,” he finally managed to get the words out. 

Both James and Sirius wrinkled their noses. “Gross, mate. She’s a Slytherin,” James commented.

“Hey! I would have been a Slytherin, if not for the hat deciding I was better off in Gryffindor.” Regulus had  _ begged _ to be put in Slytherin, and had Sirius not come to him five minutes prior with the offer to get away from their parents and move into the Potter house, the hat likely would have listened. But instead it tried to protect him from his parents, and put him with his brother. He didn’t think Slytherin itself was a bad house, it just happened to have a number of bad people. 

“And we’re glad you didn’t,” James replied, ruffling his hair. “Suppose the good thing is that Pete did get kissed.”

Peter just huffed. “Truth or dare, Remus?”

“Dare.” Peter’s dares were guaranteed to be an easy one. Last time they played, he dared Sirius to kiss Remus… after they had already gotten together. 

He had to pause to think of one, and seemed to be weighing in his head what wouldn’t be too mean. It wasn’t that Peter couldn’t match up to them with his creativity, but more that he was always worried about being too mean. No matter how ruthless the others were. “I dare you to let Sirius put eyeliner on you.”

Sirius perked again. “Well thank you, Pete.” It was a treat for him, given his love for a punky aesthetic.He looked over to Remus, raising a brow. “Should I go get it?”

Remus motioned him off. “Go ahead. I’ll accept it.” He didn’t need to be told twice, jumping up off the love seat to go get it. Once he returned, he put his art and makeup skills to work, giving Remus the best eyeliner that he could do without taking a lot of time. 

“There, even more beautiful than usual,” he declared when he finished, setting the eyeliner aside.

With a shake off his head, Remus looked to James. “Truth or dare, Prongs?”

Unlike Sirius, James didn’t shift to sit up, partially because Regulus was still laying against him. “You don’t even need to ask, Moony. Dare.” 

James was notoriously hard to dare. There were few things he found embarrassing, and if it was risky, he found it more fun. A mischievous smile came over his lips after a moment, and even James had enough wit to look nervous. “I dare you to transfigure one set of your uniforms to look like Slytherin ones and wear it for the rest of the night.”

Sirius, Regulus, and Peter all broke out laughing at that, and James’ expression of horror and betrayal only made them laugh harder. “Moony! How could you do this to me?”

Remus just shrugged, feigning innocence. “You can choose to drink or take a truth if you don’t want to.” Everyone in the room knew full well James wouldn’t chicken out, he was incredibly stubborn, and enjoyed proving himself.

“Sorry, Reg, I can’t be your pillow right now, I have to go and change,” he said, huffling a little. Regulus just laughed and sat up, watching him exit the room dramatically. Remus looked pleased that he found something James found difficult. 

It took a few minutes for James to return, looking sour in his now green-and-silver robes and tie. All things considered, he didn’t look bad. Just displeased. “Happy, Moony?” 

“Mhm. It’s your turn now though,” Remus smiled brightly, beaming at his evil idea. He could be a voice of reason at times, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t play when the opportunity presented itself. And he was dating Sirius, after all. 

James plopped back down on the couch, throwing his legs over Regulus’. “Pads, truth or dare?” 

“Honestly, I’m going to pick truth for now, because I’m comfortable right where I am, and any dare you give me would enevidably end with me having to get up, or move.” Had they been at Hogwarts, he would have put his snuggly mood aside and still picked dare for his ego, but amongst friends and family, he was willing to be lazy. 

“Would you still be with Remus if he’d been sorted into Slytherin?” Regulus gave him a look for more of the Slytherin jokes, but turned his attention to Sirius in curiosity. Even Remus was looking at him, waiting for his answer.

Sirius glared at his best friend. “If he’s still the same Moony he is now, and the situation presented itself for us to get to know him, then yes. Though I’m pretty sure if he wasn’t in Gryffindor, he’d be in Ravenclaw.”

“Awwwwww,” James and Regulus cooed together, Peter meekly joining along. 

Remus just smiled. “We met on the train. So we at least would have had that start, no matter where I was sorted. Glad to know you’d still love me, even if I wore green and silver though.” They were sappy, but they were good together. 

“‘Course I would. You’ll always be my Moony,” Sirius answered, leaning over to kiss him. 

This time, the three others in the room gagged, it was getting a bit  _ too _ sappy for their liking. With a bit of wandless magic, James tossed a pillow at them both. “You can snog later in your room. It’s your turn, Pads.”

After taking another moment for themselves, they finally pulled away and Sirius turned his attention back to the game. He glanced around, pausing on his (blood) brother. “Reg, you haven’t gone yet. Truth or dare?” 

Regulus met his eyes, and despite knowing Sirius could be evil at times, he decided to show the bravery that proved he did still fit in with the Gryffindors. “Dare.”

While he usually had a good poker face, his lips twitched in amusement. “I dare you to kiss Prongs.” 

“What?” Both Regulus and James asked at the same moment, almost as though they were each convinced they heard Sirius wrong. 

His poker face broke more then, a grin spreading on his lips. “You two are always crawling all over each other, proclaiming your love, and you kiss other places, but never the lips. How do you expect you’ll get married if you don’t kiss?”

It was true, to an extent. While Euphemia and Fleamont took him in like another son, James never became his brother. The first year was mostly awkward, then they became friends, and once they got more comfortable with each other, they started goofing around and pretending like they were together, just to annoy Sirius. They never actually claimed it to be real, or put much more effort into it than being affectionate. Most of the time, it didn’t go beyond what Sirius would do with James, except their false proclamations of love and plans for marriage one day. They never overstepped any boundary of actually kissing. As far as Regulus knew, James was straight and very in love with Lily. He’d been in love with Lily since before Regulus started school. He, personally, didn’t have much experience. A date or two here and there, and always with girls, but he wasn’t completely closed off to the idea of other men.

Regulus couldn’t change to truth, because he knew exactly what it’d be - a question as to why he wouldn’t. Even if their “relationship” was a joke, it was still only a game, and he wasn’t daring them to shag. It was just a kiss. And he didn’t want to be the only one to take a shot. So he glanced at James for his reaction to it. Game or not, he still required his consent, and if he said no, then that was an excuse alone to not do it. “James?”

“It’s just a game, yeah? Why not?” he shrugged; he didn’t seem to be having the internal conflict Regulus was having, and he wasn’t sure how to take that. 

They were  _ friends _ . There was no way to take it. James was in love with Lily, and Regulus didn’t have real feelings for him. It was a stupid dare for a game, and that’s all. “C’mere, then,” he answered, motioning him closer. When he did, there was nothing tender or slow, no gazing into each other’s eyes, hands in intimate places, or pauses for assurance. Ripping the bandaid off, Regulus just kissed him. He wouldn’t be a coward, peck his lips, and call the dare done. He’d gotten into this dare with bravery, and that was how he’d get out of it. 

It was fast and messy, but yet still a little sexy. Despite his pining over the same girl for years, James was a good kisser. They were putting on a little bit of show, but it wasn’t a long kiss. Once they felt the fulfilled the dare well, they both pulled away, James back to leaning against the couch as if nothing had happened. 

Regulus, on the other hand, had to pause. Why was it that he wanted to do it more? Or that he didn’t want it to end in the first place? There’d been a game in the Gryffindor common room called Seven Minutes in Heaven, another muggle game, where two people were locked in a room or closet together for seven minutes, able to do whatever they pleased. He wished it was more like that. But why? 

A nudge on his leg from the guy in question caused him to get pulled out of his thoughts. “Your turn, Reg.” 

While he didn’t want to look in his direction, a glance at Sirius saw him smirking, as if he could read what was going on inside Regulus’ mind, or knew something he didn’t. He shook it off, turning his attention back to the game. “Peter, truth or dare?” 

The game only lasted a few more rounds, before Sirius declared they were all too stubborn and alcohol needed to be involved, so they switched to a different game they’d heard about, Never Have I Ever. It was easier, and Regulus was glad for the alcohol, needing to drown out the confusing thoughts in his head. While part of him knew why he wanted more, he was in denial. James loved Lily, that wouldn’t change. Any feelings he had for him were pointless, and it was better to get over them, before they even fully developed. It just didn’t help that he had to keep up the charade of being fine, and continuing to pretend they were together. He’d have no reason to suddenly stop their game, at least until they got back to school, where he could say it was due to wanting James to actually have a shot with Lily. For now, he’d have to grin and bare it. And alcohol made it a lot easier. 

Even at the end of the night, when they all went off to their respective rooms (or Sirius dragging Remus into his, their intentions on how they’d spend the next hour or two clear before the door to his bedroom was even closed), Regulus’ mind was still on the one thing it shouldn’t be. He hated how much he wanted to do it again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there's interest in it, I may make a second part that actually has Regulus trying to deal with his newfound feelings. But for right now, it's an ambiguous ending. Let me know if you want a second part.


	2. A breakup.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regulus deals with his secret feelings in the only way that make sense to him.

The alcohol could only help so much. But now that he was in bed, alone, it wasn’t doing much for him. It just made the room spin. He wanted to sleep and pretend the previous night hadn’t happened, like everyone else would. Sleep was evading him, his brain not able to fall silent long enough for him to drift off. Regulus only drank enough to push off the worst of his overthinking and had he over-indulged, it would have brought questions up; Sirius was the Black who didn’t know how to pace himself with alcohol and ended up with more than a buzz. 

With a sigh, he surrendered that the idea if he just laid there long enough he’d end up passing out wasn't working. A glance at the clock told him it’d been over two hours, and at this point, he imagined even the two love birds – love dogs? – were fast asleep. So he pushed himself to sit up, slipping off the bed. Maybe if he made a cup of tea, and read for a little bit, he’d be able to get to sleep. So that’s what he set off to do, knowing full well how to move about the house without alerting anyone else that there was someone out of bed or waking them. 

When Regulus first moved into the Potter house, he hadn’t been overly keen on exploring, especially after it was lights out. Now it was home, and walking down to put on a kettle was natural and comfortable. He managed to find a bag of tea that would hopefully make him sleepy, rather than cause the opposite issue. He was good with potions and knew the effects different ingredients had on the body. Being in a house full of witches and wizards, he was able to cast a silencing charm on the kettle to prevent it’s whistle from alarming others, knowing the Ministry could never tell _who_ casted a spell, just where. Magic from the Potter house wouldn’t raise any suspicion at all. 

Once the tea was brewed, he made his way up to the library. He lit the candles around the room, picked out a good book, and made himself comfortable on the couch. If he fell asleep there, it wouldn’t be a surprise to anyone. Nor the first time. 

Regulus wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but he soon heard footsteps outside the door, then the door itself opened silently. For a moment, he thought it might be an invisible ghost or one of the Marauders in the Invisibility Cloak, but finally, a blond head peaked in nervously. Peter relaxed a little when he saw it was Regulus, not one of the parents. 

“Hey. What are you doing up?” Reg asked as he opened the door a little more.

Peter was fidgeting, as he always was. “I had to use the toilet, and saw the light on in here, so I got curious as to who was awake.” 

“Just me. Couldn’t sleep, so I decided to make tea and read. As far as I know, everyone else is fast asleep.” It was the truth, he just didn’t get into why he was awake, rather than passed out cold. 

He was quiet for another moment, playing with his fingers before chewing on his thumbnail. It seemed like he wanted to ask something or say something, and was trying to work up the courage to do it. Peter was a sweet kid, he was also just a little ball of anxiety. He would have been better suited in Hufflepuff, but he assumed the hat knew what it was doing… maybe it was hoping to teach him bravery by putting him with peers who were. So far, it hadn’t really worked. “Are you o-okay?” he finally got it out.

Observant was another way to describe Peter. He was always so quiet it gave him plenty of time to watch people and see things others may not have seen. “I’ll be okay,” was the simple answer he gave. It was enough to say that he wasn’t at the moment but to avoid worry. And he did believe it, he’d be fine. A tiny little crush wouldn’t break him, and once they got back to school, he’d end the charade. James would end up with Lily, he’d find some other girl or guy he liked, and it would all be a thing of the past.

“It’s– it’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it. But it’s ok-ay if you do too. I wo-won’t tell the others,” he managed to get out, and Regulus couldn’t help but smile. Sweet kid indeed.

“It’s okay. I’m sure you don’t wanna deal with my stuff, and it’s really not a big deal,” he assured him. The last thing he’d want to do would be to put Peter in a weird position where he had to keep a secret from his best friends. 

To his credit and surprise, Peter stepped into the room more and closed the door behind him. “I really don’t mind, if it is something you want to talk about.” 

Regulus shrugged. “Just a lot going on in my head. It doesn’t wanna quiet so I can sleep,” he explained as vaguely as he could. He marked his place in the book, setting it aside and motioned to the chair nearby in case Peter wanted to sit.

He paused, before going over to sit with him, and resumed playing with his fingers, looking down at his hands. “Is it about what happened during the game earlier?” 

Regulus had to stare at him for a moment in surprise. He knew he was observant, but he was usually pretty good at masking his emotions. He was required to for years at home. Even though the Potters tried to teach him showing emotions wasn’t a weakness, that didn’t mean he didn’t know how to conceal them when he wanted to. “What do you mean?’

Peter was growing extra fidgety, his anxiety rising. “I– it– when–” he had to pause when attempts at talking failed and took a breath. “A-after Sirius’ d-dare for you… you kind of s-seemed.. O-off. I just tho-thought maybe it had something to do with that..”

He reached over, nudging Peter’s arm gently. “Hey, breathe. You’re fine,” he commented, not wanting him to start hyperventilating or something. It also bought him time to decide how honest he wanted to be. Despite his anxiety and nerves, Peter _was_ usually pretty good at keeping secrets, at least the important stuff; he never let it slip they were animagi, or that Remus was a werewolf, only maybe a casual slip of a prank they were planning. He thought this fell into the realm of important things that Peter wouldn’t accidentally spill. “Yeah.. yeah, it does kind of have something to do with that.”

“Was it ‘cause it was we-weird?... or ‘cause it wa-wasn’t?” Again, Peter saw stuff other people rarely noticed, and that was showing. 

Regulus smiled, in spite of himself. “Oh, it was weird alright. Just.. not the kind of weird it probably should have been.”

“So you liked it.” It wasn’t phrased like a question, just there to hang in the air so Reg knew Peter understood what he meant, and gave him the opportunity to elaborate.

Reaching for his tea, he took a sip. “Yeah.. More than I should have.” 

Peter’s teeth found his lip, and he chewed so much that he was a little concerned Peter might split his own lip or at least break skin. “Why don’t you talk to him about it? Ma-maybe he liked it too..” The uncertain tone told him that Peter didn’t know something he didn’t and hadn’t been able to read James either. 

He gave a small laugh. “Pete, you’ve known James longer than I have. You were probably there the first time he saw Lily. You’ve been here the past six years. You know how he looks at her, talks about her, all that stuff. He’s in love, and it’s not going away. It’s only a matter of time before she gives in and gives him a chance, even if it’s just to shut him up.” Yes, she’d held out for six years so far, but he was showing little signs of growing up, and if he ever got to the point of calming down more, she may actually give him a chance. “So all talking to him would do would make things awkward. You guys are in school for another year and a half. And I don’t know if James and Sirius are moving out of here right after graduation… I just don’t want to jeopardize… _everything_ by telling him about something that’s not a big deal.” His brows were knitted together, showing his stress of the situation.

“But it see-seems like a big deal to you. You’re upset by it,” Peter pointed out. 

He shrugged. “It hasn’t even been twenty-four hours yet. I’m still kind of reeling over it, and coming to terms with what I figured out. I’ll process, then get over it, and things will move on like nothing ever happened.”

The blond was also looking stressed, wanting to do more, say more. Figure out a better solution. But he could also tell Regulus had made up his mind. “O-okay.. I still think if it gets bad, you should talk to _someone_ about it. Sirius and James both lo-love you.. And they wouldn’t be willing to lose you over something like this anyway.”

“I’ll talk to someone if it gets bad. I promise.” It was a hollow promise. He wouldn’t let it get to that. He’d handle it on his own, and it would be like the game had never happened.

Peter seemed to accept it though and stifled a yawn. “Are you going to be alright if I go back to bed?”

Regulus waved his hand, “go ahead. I’ll just be here reading, and hopefully go to sleep soon,” he assured him. 

They said their goodnights, and Regulus went back to reading. Once the tea started to have an effect, he slipped off to his room and was grateful sleep had stopped evading him. 

The rest of the week was… a lot. It would have been easier if they were heading back to school sooner, but it was a week of acting like everything was normal. It was hard to push the crush away and get over it when James would throw his arms around him, kiss his cheek, play with his hair, and Regulus was expected to do the same. Every time, he had to remind himself that it was just their game, and ignore how natural or comfortable it felt. It didn’t help that he was painfully aware of Peter watching him every time something happened, and he had to pretend like it wasn’t bothering him. Masking his emotions was easy… masking them and pretending to be feeling something else was a different story. 

He was grateful to go back to school, both because it gave him something to do besides lounge around the house and spend countless hours with them, and because soon he’d be able to talk to James and end this whole thing. Then the healing could really begin, and things could go back to normal. Maybe he could even go on more dates himself. 

Regulus still chose to wait a few days once they were back, partially waiting for an opportunity to present itself. He’d thought about talking to him about it on the train back, a way of starting the new term with both of them “single”, but he was worried that’d start rumours something happened over the holiday. Every at school knew it was a joke, but that didn’t mean they’d still talk and say there was a fight.

So he waited, and the right opportunity finally appeared on their third day back.

Regulus was up in their dorm room, studying for his O.W.Ls when the door opened. In the time it took for him to look up, James was already dive-bombing on his bed. “How goes the studying, Reg?”

“I will be _so_ glad when this year is over. These exams are brutal,” he said. He’d put his focus into Potions, so his primary focus was Potions, Herbology, and Charms, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to do well on the other exams. 

“And then you get to enjoy our last year with us. Bet you’re gonna miss us when you’re in your seventh year, and we’re not here,” James said, cuddled up to him.

He chuckled a little. “Of course I will.” While the Marauders weren’t his _only_ friends, and he’d have other people in his year to hang out with, that didn’t mean he wouldn’t miss them all. He was just grateful their birthdays lined up enough so that he wasn’t two years behind them. 

“Aww. Don’t worry. We’ll Owl all the time, and you can continue our legacy by telling our story.” James was grinning. Leaving would be bittersweet, for them all. Hogwarts was home, but they were also excited to get started on their lives outside of it. Summer and holidays already proved they’d stick together even once they all graduated; Sirius and Remus were together, already having had fantasy talks of moving in together after school, and James and Sirius were attached at the hip. Regulus lived with them both in and out of school for years, and they’d all make sure Peter didn’t drift away.

Regulus tried to smile, and he couldn’t get his mind off the talk they needed to have. “Hey, James?” he asked to get his attention.

He shifted at him, giving him his undivided attention. “Hmm?”

Chewing on his lip, he tried to remember everything he’d practiced in his head over the past week. “Do you think this..” he motioned between them, “is something we should kinda chill on? I mean, I know everyone knows it’s just us goofing off, but I don’t want anything to get in the way of you finally getting a date with Lily. You’ve only got a year and a half left year, and then who knows when you’ll see her again. It’s probably better if you guys get together while still at school.” It sounded rational and reasonable, and he kept his emotions out of it. “And I mean, I’m at the point I should start going on more dates too. I don’t imagine any girls I go out with would be keen on me being over one of my best friends,” he added, so it was about more than just James and Lily. It meant it was more likely to work since James couldn’t dispute Regulus being worried about him. 

James’ brows furrowed a little, seeming a bit confused and surprised. He could see a million questions in his hazel eyes and wondered if part of it was a wounded ego. His expression softened after a moment, and the playful twinkle that resembled Dumbledore’s returned. “There someone you got your eye on, Reggie?” he asked, tone playful.

It took everything not to groan. He _hated_ that nickname, and it only came out on rare occasions, but he usually complained about it when it did. This time, he chose to let it go. Part of him considered being honest, but then it would come with questions. “No, not right now at least. But you do,” he pointed out. 

He paused for a minute before nodding. “Okay. I mean, it doesn’t really work on Sirius or anyone anymore, anyway. Merlin, it was him who dared us to kiss, so he’s definitely gotten used to it.” 

It was the only time they brought up what happened during the game, and it felt like someone dropped a piece of ice down his shirt and it slid along his spine. He composed himself, putting back up the mask and smiled. “Yeah, it’s not as fun when it doesn’t have shock value or weird people out anymore,” he agreed.

“We’re still friends at least, right? Not also dumping me as a friend, ‘cause you’d rather hang out with other fifth years?” he asked, bumping their shoulders together. 

That time his laugh was genuine and he bumped back. “Yeah, of course. Not getting rid of me that easily,” he assured him.

James got up. “Good. You can be another brother, like Sirius,” he said, relocating to his own bed. 

The forced smile returned. “Yeah. Brothers. I mean, it’s basically what we are anyway,” he agreed. He was grateful their door opened and Remus and Peter came in going to their own beds. 

Remus noticed the distance between the two and smiled playfully. “Trouble in paradise? I figured we’d come up here and find James distracting Regulus from his studying.”

James huffed dramatically, playing the whole thing up. “Regulus broke up with me. Thinks it’s bad for our potential to date other people,” he said, pretending to be hurt by their “break up.”

Even before he looked up, he felt eyes on him. When he looked up from his book, he found Peter staring at him, as if in betrayal. He didn’t need to speak, the look in his eyes did it for him. _What did you do!?_ They asked.

Regulus gave the smallest shrug he could, that wouldn’t alert the others to their secret conversation. It didn’t matter, because James and Remus were lost in their own conversation. “Aww, your first heartbreak. I’m sure you’ll happily turn to Lily to mend it,” he teased.

James put a hand to his chest, throwing himself back in more dramatics, laying there. “I suppose my heart will go on.”

Remus put a hand on his shoulder, shaking it gently. “We’re here for you during this hard time.” They were both laughing, and as far as Regulus could tell, neither had any idea there was something deeper at play. Peter, however, had continued to stare at him through the whole exchange.

After a moment, the blond got up, heading directly for the door.

“Wormy? What’s up?” James asked, caught off guard by the sudden movement and hasty exit of their friend.

“Left something downstairs.” The door all but slammed and Regulus wondered if they noticed how annoyed his voice sounded, or if he just recognised it because he knew Peter was upset. If they noticed, they didn’t comment, shrugging it off and turned to their own stuff. He wasn’t sure where Peter went, but he’d be lying if he said it didn’t make him nervous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally going to be a two-part, 'cause when I first wrote it, I thought the second part would be them talking that night or shortly after... But then I got the idea to slow it down a bit more and add some angst. So Peter got involved, and this happened.  
> There's one more part that should be out pretty soon. I appreciate you guys' enthusiasm for this baby fic.  
> Comments always make me smile.


	3. Consequences.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regulus has to deal with the aftermath and consequences of his actions.

While Regulus was expecting repercussions for Peter being upset with him over his choices, they hadn’t come. At most, he’d get a glance from him that told him he disagreed with his choice, especially when James was going on about Lily or trying to impress her. They didn’t talk about it, though, and as far as he knew, Peter still didn’t tell anyone. He definitely didn’t tell James; James wouldn’t be _that_ good of an actor. 

There was some teasing throughout the school, especially in the common room, about his and James’ “break up”, but it fizzled out pretty quickly. James kept his focus on Lily, and Regulus tried to date some more. Well, as much as they _could_ date at Hogwarts. Hogsmeade weekends were rare, and he just wished that once they got to a certain age, they’d be able to go whenever they wanted. They were good at getting creative, and he was sure he’d been on more dates with a variety of people in the first month of the new term than in the rest of his time at Hogwarts. He made time for it around his studying, and it felt like the best way to get over things. None of them stuck, but it was a nice distraction. It started to feel like maybe his plan had worked, and he would be able to move on with stuff. If he ignored the pang he got when James brought up Lily.

What Regulus hadn’t been expecting was when Sirius pulled him aside, asking to talk to him while he was on his way to the library. When he agreed, Sirius took them to one of the secret spots of the castle, and for once, his brother looked like he lived up to his name. 

“What’s up?” Reg asked, looking over at him as he leaned against the wall. 

“I wasn’t gonna bring this up, cause I didn’t think it was any of my business before… but now I’m more worried about you, and I feel like it’s my job as your big brother to look after you,” Sirius explained, pacing a little in the small area. 

His brows rose. “Worried about me? Why? What are you talking about?”

Sirius sighed and stopped pacing, turning to face him with his hands on his hips. “Peter told me what happened after our night of Truth or Dare. Your conversation with him.” 

So there _were_ consequences, it had just taken some time to get there. “Dammit, Peter,” he swore under his breath. He supposed this was his way of making Regulus talk to someone else about it. 

“He’s just worried. I didn’t think it was my place to get involved anymore than I already did, and you’d sort it out for yourself. I didn’t even think much of the “break up”, but you’ve been going through people almost as fast as I used to, and that’s not like you,” he explained. Regulus could tell the concern was genuine, but that didn’t mean he was a bigger fan of it. 

“I’m fifteen. It’s about time I started dating, I just didn’t start as early as you. And it’s not like I’m shagging everyone,” he pointed out, trying to explain away the dating. “And what do you mean more involved than you already did?”

“It doesn’t matter if you’re shagging or not. You have someone new every other day. It seems more like a bunch of rebounds, instead of suddenly having an interest in dating.” He had the sense to look at least a little guilty. “I was the one who dared you to kiss, remember? I figured there may be something there. You kept up the joke for longer than most people would, and it always seemed natural for you two to be laying all over each other. And it’s different when the rest of us do it. It’s more like me and Remus.”

  
Regulus rolled his eyes a little. “James is in love with Lily. We all know that. Whether there was something there for me that I didn’t realise before the kiss or not, that’s the fact. He’s in love with someone else and has been for years. Peter wanted me to talk to James about it, but I’m not willing to risk our friendship when I already know the answer.”

Sirius crossed his arms, and gave him a look that honestly resembled Euphemia when she was disappointed in something they did. “Yes, he has a big thing for Lily, but they’re on five and a half years, and she’s showing no signs of giving in. He deserves someone who will actually care for him.” There was a reminder there of just how much James meant to Sirius. Despite all the quips, laughs, and goofing around, James would forever be the absolute most important person to Sirius. “Reg, James loves you. No, I’m not saying he’s in love with you, but he does love you. As a person, as a friend. You could talk to him about all this, and at worst, he’d just tell you as gently as he could that he only loves you as a friend or a brother. You’re not at risk of losing him.” It was Regulus’ turn to chew on his nail, not sure what he should do. “I’m not going to tell you what to do. You may not be a legal adult, but we were both raised to be independent, and you’re plenty old enough to make adult decisions. But if you want my advice, as James’ best friend and your brother? Talk to him.” 

Regulus sighed. “I’ll think about it, okay?” 

Resting a hand on his brother's shoulder, he gave it a gentle squeeze and nodded. “In the meantime, if you need anyone to talk to, I’m always here.”

He gave him a small smile and nodded. “If we’re done here, I should get some studying done.” The OWLS were stressful enough without all this emotional stuff going on. He shouldn’t even have been spending so much time on dates, but it helped him feel better. 

Sirius motioned him away. “Go, study. Make me proud,” he winked, back to his flippant and playful side. 

The decision of how to talk to James was a hard one. He did trust Sirius, and trusted how much he knew James, but that didn’t mean he still wasn’t worried about making things weird and awkward. No, James may not drop him as a friend, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t feel weird and forced after that. It’d be an easier conversation to have if they were getting ready to graduate, but they still had over a year together.

Despite his frustrations, he didn’t get mad at Peter, knowing he had the best intentions. Still, he didn’t talk to either Sirius or Peter about it, putting his focus in _how_ he’d talk to James if he did. All around doing his work for O.W.L.s.

It wasn’t until Regulus made a messy and careless mistake in Potions and Slughorn expressed concern that he decided he had to talk to him about it. It was getting in the way of his school work, and he couldn’t and wouldn’t let it mess up his school work.

Once he was done with class, he went off to find James. Not in the library, their hideouts, or anywhere in the Gryffindor dorm. He glanced out the window, seeing that despite the snow that was still covering the ground, he was hanging out by the lake.

Taking a breath, Regulus made the long trek, wishing that he was both old enough to aparate and could inside the school grounds. He sucked it up and made the walk anyway. There was still plenty of chill in the air, and he tugged his robes around him tighter. He was grateful that James was alone, assuming no one else was insane enough to come out in the weather

“Hey,” Regulus greeted as he came over.

James looked up, surprised to find someone else there. He’d been so focused on trying to get the essay done, he clearly hadn’t heard Regulus approach. “Hey. What’s up?”

There was no backing down now. There wasn’t much reason he could come up with for being out there, unless it was _something_. “Can we talk?”

“‘Course. Always time for you, Reg,” he said, patting the spot next to him. James had at least had enough sense to bring something to sit on, and was bundled up. When Regulus sat, he put his parchment aside to give him his undivided attention. “What’s up?’

No matter how many times he tried to come up with a way, there was nothing that sounded decent with how to discuss it. There was no gentle way to bring it up, or to beat around the bush. No one he could figure out how to fish for whether or not James felt more. So honest and being blunt was best. “I wasn’t entirely honest about our reason for the “break up” a few weeks ago,” he admitted.

His brows jumped briefly in surprise, but he watched him. It was clear in his eyes he was trying to figure out himself what the reason was. “What was it, then? Was I right, and there’s someone you have feelings for?”

His breath caught in his throat, not anticipating the question. But it did give him the perfect opening… He sighed and finally nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, actually I do.”  
James could be incredibly smart, but he could also be incredibly dense. There were no signs of true understanding in his eyes, and for the moment, Regulus was a little glad for it. It gave him control of the conversation. “Who is it? Anyone I know?”

He couldn’t help but laugh. “Yeah… you definitely do.” When James opened his mouth to guess, something he could just tell after knowing James for years, he held up a hand. “No, please don’t start listing people we know. We’d be out here for a while.”

James pouted at his fun being ruined. “Okay, okay. It’s not Peter or Remus, right? Sirius loves you, but he really wouldn’t be cool with you crushing on his boyfriend.” 

Regulus almost wanted to say that it was more wondering if Sirius would be cool with him crushing on his best friend… but he already knew how Sirius felt about it, and he wanted to say it gentler than that. “No, not Remus or Peter. Not Lily either, if you’re concerned about that.” 

“Good to know. It’s not a Slytherin, is it?” Regulus just shook his head. “Then who?”

Now it was a matter of how to say it… Instead of overthinking it, he let it all out, while trying to reign in some babbling: “It’s you, James. I didn’t know about it until recently. Until the game. I knew I couldn’t put it aside while we were still playing around, pretending to be dating, and I know you’re in love with Lily. I wasn’t planning on saying anything at all, but Sirius and Peter both at least think you deserve to know. I don’t want to mess up what we have or make it awkward. I’m working on getting over it, I won’t be pining over you or anything, it’s just something that takes time, and I wanted you to know the truth.”

James sat there, quiet, and his face hard to read. There was confusion and surprise there, and the look of a million questions was back, but he didn’t say anything. He was quiet for so long that he was worried that Sirius was wrong, and it would be too much for him to handle. That the next year and a half or more would be awkward, and things wouldn’t be the same.

He was quiet for so long that Regulus put a hand down on the blanket to put his weight on so he could get up. “I’m sorry, if I should have kept my mouth shut. I hope this isn’t enough to ruin our friendship. I’ll give you space,” he said, starting to push himself up. It was only a hand on his arm that stopped him from getting up.

“What if I don’t want you to get over it? To get over me?” James finally asked, voice so quiet he almost missed it.

He blinked, surprised and confused. “What do you mean?”

“You aren’t the only one who liked the kiss, Reg. If they gave us the dare and left us alone, I would have kept kissing you. I didn’t know I'd like it either, but I did. I just pretended I didn’t. I liked the affection after, ‘cause I thought maybe it could be a way to do it again. Our first few days back, while we were hanging out, I almost did.” His cheeks were a little pink, and Regulus wasn’t sure if it was from the confession or the cold. “When you told me you wanted to stop it, I figured you’d been grossed out by it and decided it was too much. I would have kept it up,” he shrugged. 

“But Lily–” 

“Lily doesn’t like me. No matter what I do, she doesn’t. It sucks, and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt, but it’s a fantasy. With you, it’s a reality. I hope that doesn’t make you sound like second choice, because it’s not… You’re not. It’s just that she’s a crush, and stuff between you and me feels real. She could come down here now, proclaim her love, tell me she’s made the biggest mistake and wants to be with me, and I’d say no.” Tentatively, James reached over, taking Regulus’ hands in his gloved ones. 

Regulus chewed on his lip, holding his hands. He never let him imagine the good scenarios because he was trying to get over him, trying not to get his hopes up. Imagined the bad plenty of times, but never the good. “You really wanna do this?”

“I really do. If you do.” When Regulus nodded, he leaned over closer, searching for consent. This time, it was everything their first kiss should have been; staring into each other’s eyes, moving slow, and once their lips met, James let go of his hands to rest one hand on his waist and the other on his cheek. It was slow and sensual, and it showed off more of James’ natural talent. It was everything he’d pictured when wishing for Seven Minutes in Heaven and more. Regulus melted into the kiss, ignoring the cold around them as they kissed each other breathless.

“Finally! I knew they’d get together.” The two nearly jumped apart as they heard another voice. When they looked over to where the sound had come from, there was nothing at first. A ghost? 

No, there was a ripple, and then Sirius, Remus, and Peter were standing together with Sirius holding the Invisibility Cloak, the three huddled together to fit. 

“What the bloody hell are you three doing here?” Regulus asked, trying to calm his pounding heart, and he wasn’t sure if it was from stuff with James or getting startled by the company.

Sirius shrugged. “We saw you looking all around, and realised you were looking for James. It wasn’t hard to figure out why you were looking for him, and we wanted to see how it played out.”

Peter looked apologetic, and Remus didn’t seem to know how to feel. “We told him to leave you guys be, but we figured it’d be safer if we were all here,” Peter said. 

“I told them both you’d get together. Thought it would happen faster… you guys took forever. But I knew one of you would eventually break,” Sirius declared, looking proud of himself, which earned him an elbow in the ribs from Remus. 

“What my idiot of a boyfriend is trying to say is that we’re happy for you both, and we’re glad you sorted things out,” Remus amended. 

James laughed. “At least I know I don’t have to ask for the brother’s permission then..” he commented, smiling over at Reg and took one of his hands again.

Sirius grinned. “Hey, it only further cements us as brothers. And if you’re both happy, I’m happy for you. Just… don’t snog all over the castle, common room, and bedroom, yeah?”

James and Regulus exchanged an amused glance. “What, you mean like you do with Remus?” Regulus asked.

“Hey, Remus isn’t related to either of you,” he defended himself, hands up.

They rolled their eyes. “Doesn’t mean we like seeing it, Pads,” James said. “If you don’t wanna see us snog, I advise you to go do something else though. Cause I’ve been wanting to do it for weeks, and I intend to now that I can,” he warned. Regulus shivered a little, and it wasn’t because of the cold.

“We’ll leave you be. Don’t get frostbite. I’ll go enjoy my alone time with Moony… maybe Peter can find Emma,” he answered, winking playfully at Peter, who howled in annoyance. Their voices drifted off as they walked away, thankfully.

James turned his attention back to Regulus. “I believe we have time to make up for? Unless you need to do some homework.”

“Homework can wait,” Reg said, pulling him over and kissed him again. They spent more time than they probably should have snogging by the lake, until the sun set and they were too cold to continue. It wasn’t hard for the school to take notice that things were back on between them, but this time, it was real. Lily seemed relieved to have James off her case, and James genuinely seemed to have moved on from her. He was happy with Regulus, and they worked well together. Regulus knew how to reign James in when it was needed, but also loved him for who he was. Sirius was still over the moon about it, and Peter was happy for them, despite it meaning he was the only single one in the group. It definitely made him reconsider going after Emma again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may or may not be working on an alternate ending chapter... Because apparently writing almost 10k words on the base story enough wasn't enough for me. Oops.  
> Hope you guys enjoyed this ending though.


	4. Alternate Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things go a different route for James and Regulus after winter break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What was meant to be a one-shot turned into a three-chapter story, with an alternate ending. Oops? The first paragraph or two is the same as the beginning of chapter 2, just to re-familiarise you guys with where this story picks up. The rest is all fresh.

_(Picks up in the middle of part two. Regulus and Peter still had the same conversation.)_

The rest of the week was… a lot. It would have been easier if they were heading back to school sooner, but it was a week of acting like everything was normal. It was hard to push the crush away and get over it when James would throw his arms around him, kiss his cheek, play with his hair, and Regulus was expected to do the same. Every time, he had to remind himself that it was just their game, and ignore how natural or comfortable it felt. It didn’t help that he was painfully aware of Peter watching him every time something happened, and he had to pretend like it wasn’t bothering him. Masking his emotions was easy… masking them and pretending to be feeling something else was a different story. 

He was grateful to go back to school, both because it gave him something to do besides lounge around the house and spend countless hours with them, and because soon he’d be able to talk to James and end this whole thing. Then the healing could really begin, and things could go back to normal. Maybe he could even go on more dates himself. 

The Marauders still insisted he take breaks and join them at times in the common room, claiming his brain was going to melt if he kept pouring over his studies. He was pretty positive it didn’t work like that, but surely his inky black hair would end up with silver streaks like Remus' if he didn’t take breaks. 

So he found himself seated next to James, an arm draped around his shoulder, and trying to keep his mind off how much better he felt being there. He refused to meet Peter’s eyes, or even so much as glance much at him, knowing already the look he’d be given. Sirius was on a tangent of a story that had happened over the break, which led to almost destroying one of the Christmas trees in the Potter house.

“I don’t know how you deal with living with them, Reg,” Dorcas commented once he’d finished his long tale.

Regulus just shrugged. “I try to keep them out of trouble, or at least stay out of it, but sometimes I get dragged into it. Mr and Mrs Potter usually know I was involved against my will though.” Neither he nor Sirius had ever grown accustomed to calling them by Mum or Dad. On occasion, they may refer to them in their first names with each other, and Sirius would say Mum/Dad to James. It was a bit complicated, but they made it work. 

“What they don’t know is that you can be just as much of a mischief maker as the rest of us,” James teased, squeezing him gently. 

“Maybe I’m just a good enough actor to fool you,” he teased back, and there were times when he pushed himself out of his own head that it did feel natural, and like nothing had happened.

“Nah. We know the truth. And we know you love us anyway.” Then James did something Regulus would have never expected; he kissed him. It was quick and casual, the same type of kiss Remus would give to Sirius as he was leaving for the library or class. He didn’t even fully have time to react.

He glanced around the room, seeing looks of surprise on the faces of others as well, though no one voiced their confusion. Everyone was fully aware of the way they acted around each other, but they also knew it was fake. Seeing them kissing on the lips was never a line they crossed (since they didn’t know about the dare over winter.)

Sirius was thankfully quick to fill the silence so it didn’t get awkward. “Yeah, Reg. We know you enjoy it more than you let on,” he said, and there was a look he gave his little brother that clearly said the statement had an intentional double meaning. 

Not wanting to give him the satisfaction or give anything away, he just laughed it off. “Think what you want. I think it’s just your egos talking.”

That day was the start of something that Regulus couldn’t explain. Kissing had apparently become part of something they did when they were playing the part of being in love. James was always the one to initiate it, and it was mostly short, brief kisses. It was only when they were amongst their peers though, the Marauders not counting. It left a lot of questions, but he could never bring himself to question it. He knew it should have been a bigger reason to end things, but the truth was, he didn’t want to. Sometimes he could just pretend that it wasn’t dramatics, that it wasn’t likely a new tactic to shock people and make them a bit uncomfortable. And it hadn’t gone unnoticed that Lily came up in conversation less, and her being around wouldn’t be a cause for James to rein it in, and act like they were just friends. The only time she was brought up was if someone else mentioned her. Maybe it was multifaceted; the dare gave him a new way to cause shock and discomfort, and it also gave him the idea to make Lily jealous. Maybe James believed if she saw him kissing someone else, acting all coupley, and he stopped chasing after her, she’d realise her feelings. He imagined James would figure it wasn’t a big deal, since Regulus hadn’t complained or questioned it, so it wasn’t like he was using him or manipulating him. He didn’t know the truth of how Regulus felt, so to him, there wasn’t anything wrong with it. 

He knew he _should_ talk to him about it. He was meant to be ending it and getting over him, not working on falling more. Not getting used to cuddling up to him on the couch, holding hands, or kisses when parting. It would make it even worse when it all ended, and likely cause irreversible damage. 

The rational part of him mind knew all this, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to allow it to keep going for a little bit longer. 

A little bit longer turned into the beginning of February. It had been over a month since their first kiss at home, and was nearing a month of them doing it casually at school. He still frequently found Peter giving him various looks from concern, to confusion, to looking like he wanted to pull Regulus aside and talk to him about it, but his nerves held him back. He tried to convey that he would be okay, and he’d figure it out soon, but he wasn’t sure how much Peter ever believed him. 

Just like everyone had done when they started the whole fake dating, they got used to it, and while it would still cause some reactions, they mostly understood it was part of their relationship now. Just no one knew whether they’d genuinely gotten together over the holiday break, and honestly, neither did Reg. What was once a clear line of two friends goofing off was now blurred, and continued to get blurrier.

It didn’t stop or get easier. Actually, it escalated. It was getting progressively more common to find the two in a little alcove of the castle during freetime, fully snogging. It was still never on their own, and they never bothered to relocate to a broom closet or their dorms. It was always in the open where everyone could see. Yet it still felt intimate and sexy, and was doing Regulus and his feelings absolutely _no_ favours. He continued to wish it was real, wish they could actually be a thing, and he’d been tempted a number of times to kiss James while they were alone to see how he reacted.

He withheld, not wanting to send everything shattering to the ground and making it worse. He held out hope that at some point they’d be able to talk and resume just being normal, platonic friends, and feared if he tried to start something in private, James would get upset. 

Even in public, 99.5% of their kisses were initiated by the older boy, and he was also to blame for any time they started snogging. Regulus only did it out of a newfound comfort and his subconscious decided it was a normal and okay thing to do. He rarely knew he was doing it until after it already happened. 

Regulus knew they needed to have a conversation, though. Even if it was just to understand each other better. If it truly was a new part of their (far too long running) joke, he felt they should know boundaries, so Reg could stop worrying about doing the wrong thing. Maybe he’d be right, and James would confess to it being an attempt to make Lily jealous. He just needed to clear it up, so he could stop hoping or pretending it was a real relationship. Maybe if he heard James say it was just them goofing off, or the Lily thing, he’d be able to keep that in mind, and keep himself from digging a deeper grave for himself. 

He’d talk to him. He’d force himself to. 

Figuring out the right time was next to impossible, however. He didn’t want to bring it up when they were out amongst other people, especially since they usually had company in one way or another, and he didn’t want it to be a big thing if it went badly for some reason. But asking him anytime they were both alone in their dorms didn’t feel much better. It felt too intimate, and he felt that intimacy would make his questions suspicious. 

The time Regulus actually felt may be the best opportunity he could get was a party in the common rooms one Friday. They smuggled alcohol in, turned up the music, and all different years were gathered. There was even the sign of a few Ravenclaws or Hufflepuffs, if they were friends with or dating someone in Gryffindor. 

James had tugged him off by one of the walls, all but pinning him against it as they kissed. He tasted of cinnamon and cloves, knowing one of the rare times he indulged in smoking was at parties, unlike Sirius, who did it almost daily. The Firewhisky was a better taste on his lips than when it was being drunk. The kissing was a bit messy and quick, and he was sure it put on a show, seeing James’ hands either tangled in his long black curls, or on his neck, flashes of their tongues on the other’s, or biting lips. Regulus mostly opted to keep his hands in a safe space, on his hips or chest. 

He didn’t know why this felt like the time to talk to him about it, in hindsight it was probably the least expected time to, since they were a bit busy.. But maybe it was the intense feeling in his chest and stomach that told him he absolutely _had_ to, and very soon. “James?” he asked around the kisses, not yet able to get himself to pull away.

“Mm?” he murmured against his lips, apparently also not ready to stop, but showed he was listening. 

“What is this?” As soon as he asked the question, he regretted it. Except not for the reason of being afraid to have the conversation or anything, at least for the current moment.

He felt James smirk. “This,” he began, still talking around the other activity their lips were involved in, “has many names… kissing, snogging, I even hear sometimes it’s called making out.” _That_ was why he regretted the question. He knew it had been a perfect opening for one of James’ notoriously bad puns. 

If his eyes weren’t closed, he would have rolled them. Relishing in the kiss for a few seconds longer, he finally pulled away, even though he couldn’t go far. They were still very intimately close, and neither made a move to take their hands off each other. “I mean, this,” he motioned between them. “Is it just a new way to weird people out? Is it to make Lily jealous? If it’s the latter, I can do more if I know,” he explained, trying to avoid making it seem like he thought it was anything remotely serious or insinuate that there may be feelings involved - on either end. 

“It’s not about Evans,” was all James clarified for the moment. 

When a few moments of silence between them passed, Regulus decided to speak. “I just want to know what boundaries we have. Last thing I’d want to do would be to freak you out or make you uncomfortable,” he explained. 

Tugging him gently forward, he murmured, “you don’t have to worry about that,” before resuming what had been interrupted. 

That _wasn’t_ a helpful answer. All it explained was that it wasn’t about Lily, but not anything else, and he was just as confused as before… if not worse. He let himself enjoy the kissing once again for a few more seconds, before pulling back again. “I just… don’t know if this is something we do as a show and part of the running gag that we’re destined to be married, or if this is friends with benefits, or…” he trailed off, hoping maybe it’d come off that he didn’t have another explanation, but in his head, it was his way of asking if James had feelings. 

This time, it was James’ turn to bite his lip. “I don’t fully know.. If we’re honest. I just know doing all this stuff just feels natural and right. It’s why I said you don’t have to worry about making me uncomfortable… I don’t know if that’s something I can feel around you.”

It wasn’t the clearest answer, but it didn’t seem like James knew enough to give a better one. “It feels natural and right for me too. That's why I asked. I didn’t want to get comfortable, or overstep a line if it was about Lily or just more of us pretending.” 

“It’s not either of those things. The first time I kissed you when we got back to school was… I don’t want to say it was an accident, but it wasn’t something I realised I was doing until I already did it. You didn’t freak out, or ask questions, so I did it again, more consciously. Again, you didn’t ask questions or freak out,” he paused to take a breath, keeping himself calm, and seemingly trying to work through his own thoughts. “I liked it, and you didn’t hate it, so it became a habit. You even did it yourself a few times. I tried to see what would happen if they lasted longer, and that just became a thing of snogging between classes.”

Regulus watched him, glad that it wasn’t something James was flippantly doing, but so far, none of this meant there were actual feelings yet. Sometimes people just liked to be physical. Maybe that’s what it was. Still, he kept quiet, letting him talk his way through his thoughts and feelings. 

“I thought if I kept it to public places, it wouldn’t cause questions, including Sirius, Remus, and Peter. But there are times when we’d be hanging out in the dorms, especially if we were laying together, that I’d want to. It just felt like a line that once I stepped over, I wouldn’t be able to come back from if it was too much.” 

Their thoughts were very similar, the only difference being that James had started most of it, and as far as Regulus could tell, he wasn’t sure what his feelings were. He knew how he felt. “I wanted to do it in the room too. It’s why I asked what this was. There were quite a few times I wanted to lean over and kiss you while we laid together, or I’d come in and find you alone, and I had to resist a hello kiss.” He was trying desperately hard to avoid outing the fact he knew he had feelings. If James only wanted friends with benefits, he could learn to be okay with that. But there was no way James would go for it, if he knew Regulus had feelings. 

James hesitated for a moment, but finally continued. “Lately, I haven’t been thinking much about Lily… more about you…” He confessed. “Which seems to me like it’s something more than just wanting friends with benefits.”

If James was being honest, Regulus knew that meant he should be too. That didn’t exactly make it easy. “I’ve been thinking about you… as more than a friend, since the game.” There. It was said, and he couldn’t take it back. “If we’re being honest, I was planning on talking to you when we got back here, saying we should cool it on all the affection, under the guise that I thought it’d hurt your chances with Lily… But then you kissed me again, a few times, and I didn’t want it to stop. I got to the point I knew it was important we talked, and figured things out.”

James’ lips turned up in a mischievous smirk. “So you picked while we were snogging,” he teased.

He pushed him gently. “Shut up. I couldn’t figure out when to talk to you about it. This seemed as good of a time as any.” 

He just laughed. “This is something you want, then? And more?” 

Regulus nodded, albeit a bit shyly. It still didn’t feel like it was real. 

“Good. Cause I do too.” There was no more need to talk, so James pulled him back to kiss him again. 

Nobody had paid their conversation any attention, which left the majority of the school still trying to figure out if they’d gotten together over Christmas, or were still just screwing with people. They insisted on not answering questions, simply because it drove people nuts. The only ones who knew the truth were the other Marauders. It was hard for them not to realise the escalation when they walked in to find the two snogging away in one of their beds, or the fact they were closer than ever. James had wanted to pull the same joke on them, not answering any questions, but it was one time where Regulus stepped in to try and bring him down a bit. Their friends at least deserved to know the truth, though they’d pretty much figured it out on their own. Sirius knew before anyone, which was the whole point of the dare.

“Just… put a tie or something on the door if clothes are gonna come off, yeah? I’m fine if you two want to be all over each other, I’m used to it. But I’d rather not walk in on something that’ll scar me for life,” Sirius had requested. 

“Or at least use your curtains and a silencing charm,” Remus amended, knowing full well sometimes things escalated beyond original intentions.

“We’ll try to remember,” Regulus assured them.

“Try,” James echoed, but it was paired with a wink. Regulus had a feeling if things did get hot and heavy, and he was too distracted, that James wouldn’t be so quick to remind him. Sirius seemed to make the same conclusion, and groaned a bit, throwing a pillow at his best mate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This wasn't even a plan, lol. I had _kinda_ thought about doing an angsty version where Reg walked in on James and Lily kissing, but it didn't line up right... so when James and Reg were talking in the original ending, James' comment about nearly kissing him inspired this.  
> Hope you enjoyed the alternate take.  
> Curious -- which ending was your favourite? The original or the alternate?


End file.
